Unwritten rules women should know

Ladies, sure we have to go through your PMS, your emotional breakdowns, your flips, your paranoia, etc...
But come on! "Love" is a double edged sword! We men have rules, and here's some you should know about!

One month rule
Broke up with a guy? Ok, fine, don't care who's fault it is, just know this... You HAVE to wait AT LEAST ONE MONTH before dating again. Why? Think about it, if you can't stand a month without having another wiener in your pants, that says a lot about you (You're a whore!)

Duck Face
Taking pictures isn't a bad thing, until a certain extent (But I'll soon get into that). If you take a picture of yourself, please don't do this:

Picture says it all

Camwhoring
Until a certain extent! I told you! Don't take a picture every 5 seconds! Take everything into moderation.

Why am I a whore and he's not?

Putting it simply, if a lock is opened by multiple keys, its a bad lock, but if a key opens many locks, its a master key.

Dude! Don't!

Ok, fine, you're having a bad day, but is it his fault? No, its not, but trust me, his day sucks now thanks to you. Yeah. We're just too nice to tell you. And if there is a big interval after you ask him if something is wrong, even if he says no, something is. Probably you.

Finally

Hey, I'm no douche-bag, we have to take all your bullshit, why can't you take ours? Aren't women fighting for equality? Then treat us as you expect us to treat you!

"For the benefit of Miss Rogers"

The English language is often quite inadequate. Not because of the lack of words to chose from, but because a lot of the useful phrases have connotations or implications.

Today was mine and Lucy's first daytime date. We went for a picnic in the park. It was really nice and relaxed, and we're beginning to be less guarded around each other.

When I dropped her back at her home there was an awkward silence. Eventually Lucy asked if we were "you know...".

I explained that I really fancied her, and I liked spending time with her.

"But?" she asked.

"No buts" I explained. I really do want to spend more time with her.

So after about 10 minutes of trying to find the right words, we decided we were boyfriend and girlfriend and both went off with silly grins on our faces. We're off to see my friend's band tomorrow night.

But I still cant find the right words:

Dating - Nope, that's what we've been doing.
Going out - sounds like something said in high school
Exclusive - Lucy liked this suggestion, but its still not the right word
Involved - too euphemistic
Going steady - What is this? The 50s?

Any ideas?